[Scrapsathome]

Speaking to the issue of whether or not to help them get their daughter baptized or pierce their ears if it's a religious/cultural thing, I would say that foster parents (even as "agents of the government") have no requirement to do that.

The constitution says that government shall make no laws restricting the free exercise of religion, nor shall it create a government religion that we all have to follow. It doesn't say that the government shall help you practice your religion in any way. While custody of the children belongs to the state the parents have temporarily lost their right to direct their children's upbringing. Can you imagine if the bio parents were of a religion that requires you to pray X number of times a day and were able to get a judge or CW to demand that foster parents must ensure that the children pray that number of times? Or if they said the kids had to celebrate every one of their religion's holy days in their foster home? Where would you draw the line? What if there isn't a single foster family willing to devote an entire Saturday to focus on nothing but God like the 7th Day Adventists require every week? Where do you put the kids? Or if this were required of foster parents, wouldn't it also apply to public schools? Wouldn't teachers have to allow Muslim students to interrupt class for prayer and foot washing?

Finally, it seems to me that if bio parents were allowed to make demands about baptism or other religious/cultural things they could abuse this thoroughly. Bio parents who previously only attended church (or temple or whatever) twice a year at most could suddenly claim that their children needed to be in church multiple times a week. Or if they could remotely claim to be Jewish they could demand that the state and foster parents put their children in Hebrew school. This could go on and on. My older two (8 and 13) foster kids' parents fall into the "seasonal attendance" category when it came to their Buddhist faith. It wouldn't make any sense for me to be required to take them there when I'd actually be encouraging more involvement in their faith than their parents would.

So my point is that you shouldn't feel obligated to do either thing (piercing/baptism) just because the mom would like it. And, on a side note, I would not be letting the bio mom call me every day. That would be a major inconvenience and infringement on my time. I'd nip that in the bud immediately.

Jess