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Originally Posted by BrockBaby
kathy...I guess if I were to sum up what it is I realized today, I am responsible for my own life (that's not new, I've always taken responsibility for my life..usually too much responsibility..I take on everyone else's responsibility as well) but the truth is I am NOT responsible for my bmom's life. I do not have to hold onto a false sense of responsibility anymore. Even though she isn't IN my life, I was still allowing her opinions of me to play in my head and heart...and today I realized this, and I am swimming parallel now, not letting that riptide to take me any further out from the person I am suppose to be....Make sense????
The thing is, I don't blame my bmom...but I think I have taken on a lot of blame from her, and I've allowed it to make me question myself. Do I allow the "grateful" card to play into some of this?? I am still examining some of the "riptides" that have pulled me.....
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No matter what I had or didn't have, no matter what I have or don't have, no matter what I want or don't want - no matter what I will or won't have -
I am my only possiblity of becoming myself.
Easy to say, hard to do sometimes, especially if the kinks haven't been unraveled!
Congrats on unraveling that one (((Brock)))