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I totally understand where you're coming from. My dad was dead set against the whole open adoption idea. So much so that when we matched with J and J and I called to tell him about it, he suggested we pass on this match and wait for one like with our oldest daughter, in other words wait until we could find a closed adoption situation. I was shocked that he would even suggest such a thing, and extremely hurt. I ended up writing a long letter and sending him the book "Adoption Is a Family Affair!: What Relatives and Friends Must Know". When I called him in Holland to see what he'd thought of the book, he told me it was too dry to read and he'd stopped after the first couple of pages.
I guess some people you just can not convince to change their minds about certain things. And I think it's nice of you to be so respectful of your extended family's feelings. I guess I'm just tired of having to think of others and feel like my first obligation is to my kids and their first families.
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