[wantaskinbaby]

I, too, have wondered what to say to this type of statement. I usually stay quiet because not only do I get offended at the implication that they would love the children far more than I do, but also because I feel that it is a very convenient excuse not to do foster care.

I'm trying very hard to remember that it took me a long, long time before I felt that I could comply with the requirements of a foster parent, especially complying with a plan for reunification, so in many ways, I have been exactly where the people are who say that they couldn't do foster care because they would get too attached.

I still get very angry though. In our church, one of our core values is that children are important, however, there are only two couples (us included) in our entire church who have done foster care and we are the only ones who are currently fostering any children. I sometimes just want to stand up and yell at people that if they really, truly love children, then they would give the ones who don't have a loving, stable home somewhere to live where they will be loved and provided for, even if it means that they have to risk getting hurt themselves.

The true definition of love is to be able to do what is best for the other person, even if it means that very action may not serve our own best interest or desires. This is what foster parents do every day, we try to do what is best for our children, including getting attached, knowing that we may end up getting hurt in the end. Foster parenting is one of the most selfless acts of service that anyone could ever do. I guess not everyone can be that selfless.