First if all, WOW!! What a great dilemma to have!!
While moving forward with both sounds great in some ways, I would think carefully about it. An 18 month old who suffers from neglect is a VERY different situation then a newborn. The little guy will need a LOT of help and support - not just to get developmentally up to speed but to properly attach to you - and you'd have to be willing to make that a priority while dealing with a newborn. Doable, but definitely challenging.
If you go with the infant, ask yourself, how do I feel about the fact that the e-mom could change her mind after birth?
If you go with the 18-month and not a newborn, ask yourself, how do I feel about adopting a toddler and not a newborn?
Tough questions, but I'm crossing my fingers that somewhere in there is the child that was meant to call you "Mommy."
__________________
Jillian
Anabel's mom
Daughter's DOB 4/18/2006
Receive referral 6/1/2006
HOME AS A FAMILY 12/23/2006
June 2009: Officially waiting for kiddo #2!
7/2009: Profiled - decide it's not the right fit for our family. Back to waiting!
10/2009: Profiled - not selected. Back to waiting!