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I Hate My Birthday Too!
I can empathize with you. My birthday is in two more days, Dec.30th. I'm an adoptee and have felt hatred, anger, resentment, abandonment, depression for YEARS and about every emotion there is out there! I can tell you this, I STILL want to know who they are. I have this feeling about parenting, as I AM a parent and grandparent. As a parent, we are REQUIRED to watch our children and be responsible for them. If the children are abused, or molested, it falls back to the parents, "why did you allow this child to be with THAT person?!" "what were YOU THINKING?!" For PARENTS to adopt a child out and seal the records and never look back is unconscienable to me. I guess I still have the anger toward them. I could NEVER do that! This means EVEN if I WERE 15 years old! I'd find a way and I WOULD keep my baby! I still and always will believe they should have gotten an abortion. I've never believed I should have been here. I guess it's a prenatal thing of awareness I must've felt. I was told at 7 I was adopted and my parents were killed in a car accident. I STILL have VIVID memories of that day and wish I could forget it! It reoccured when my younger brother was told the same thing and I became enraged like nobody's business! I was LIVID! I calmed him down and told him to go out to play and it was a lie as I'd been told the same story! I hate my birthday too. Only because it's close to Christmas and every school year I couldn't bring treats ON MMMMYYYYY day as we were out of school. I always had to celebrate it on another day and I resented that. People give me gifts for my BD early and expect me to open them then! Then when my BD IS here it's empty and nothing to open as if it were just another day! Nobody wants to celebrate on your birthday because "I want to out the NNNNEEEEXXXXTTT
night!!!!" I mean REALLY, WHO CAN COMPETE WITH PARTYING ON NEW YEAR'S EVE?!?!?!?!?! I'm NOT about to celebrate then as everyone is celebrating THE NEW YEAR!!!! What a COLD time of the year!!!! I HATE MINE TOO! I hope my birthparents are HAUNTED by my memory!
How birthparents "THINK" they're doing the right thing....THEY BETTER BE 100% SURE first! How do they know these babies aren't sexually molested by their adopted families?! I don't want to be a dirty little paper trail! I STILL say and ALWAYS WILL SAY they should have gotten an abortion! These sealed adoptions are nothing more than LEGAL, MENTAL ABUSE! AND THE STATE IS MAKING MONEY FROM IT! Tell me WHY I CANNOT know MY BIRTH PARENTS?! But it's OKAY TO KNOW WHO MY PRESIDENT SLEEPS WITH?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I asked my Governor that right to his face! He DID try to help me. For that I will be eternally grateful to Governor Blagojevich!
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