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Originally Posted by Amandak249
I think you're probably right...
My idea to cut off contact does not stem from a real desire to stop the relationship, but maybe just to be taken seriously. It's a dramatic step, and perhaps I want to take it because I feel like my bfamily isn't really hearing me. And of course there is the less than noble motive in that I want my bdad to be angry with my bsister for having ruined this reunion ( because for all intensive purposes, she has made it very difficult) I don't want her to get away with it. How many years should I take her abuse? What, am I just supposed to idly wait and bide my time and take all of her crap until SHE decides she wants a relationship? What about MY needs?
I feel stuck in this... and my anger is really beginning to take its toll...
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You know, I understand completely where you are coming from, everyone in this situation seems to lick their own wounds and have concerns about their nearest and their dearest but forget that there is one other person they should have to care about, as it is us adoptees, or atleast I know I did, not only have our own emotions to deal with but concerns on the bfamily and our adoptive families, we are pulled in so many directions trying to do what is right for everyone.
Your feelings are just as important, like I said before I think you should write 2 letters leaving the door open for your bfamily and dad and your bsister to contact you when they are ready. Stop the chasing and doing everything that is right, you have done that and nowit is their turn.
In the mean time you take care of yourself, and make sure you are looking after what you need for a change