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Dear Amandak249,
I agree with JustPeachy 100%. It sounds as if it would be best to simply have a relationship with your bdad that doesn't include your bsister - at least for now. From what you've posted, your bdad seems to be a kind and reasonable person. Perhaps he will take your bsib's age into account and understand that, at this juncture at least, you can't have anything to do with her; that she is too immature to handle whatever her underlying issues are.
There are 5 types of action in psychology; Avoidance, acceptance, deflection, rejection and resolution.
In trying to have a relationship with your birthsister, you have certainly done an admirable job in applying the first 4.
Perhaps resolution is the only option left for you then. Extend an invitation to your bdad to be part of your life but explain politely that until your sister can work out what upsets her, you need to keep your distance from her.
JustPeachy is right; she should treat you with respect.
__________________
Janey
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