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Yes. When I had former fd (who is now in residential) I felt that way. Her issues were food focused, extreme amount of acting out sexually, tantrums... I thought love, consistency, therapy and things like that would help heal her. When after almost a year they didn't it really wore on me deeply, and some days it still does. I think the only difference I have made in her life is to let her know sometimes no matter what some people don't leave. (we visit and do phone calls). We still have a letter of intent with her but I doubt she will be considered able to thrive in a home environment for years.
Don't be hard on yourself. You are an excellent parent.
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