when you realize that the best you can do isn't good enough to make a difference?
We've had Rebel and Diva for more than six months now. Their mom has made little to no progress in any direction and we have so little doubt that they'll ever be reunified with her. Their issues are abundant, the more serious ones surrounding hoarding/foraging and acting out in anger and frustration. We thought with enough love and consistancy we could pull them out of some of that. We had the resources and got them all the help we could. I've spent all day, every day with them since the day they got here with the exception of one respite weekend when we were up deer hunting (the only time we've had alone as a couple since they got here - two days). We've long surpassed our physical and emotional limits.
Our two young children are over the screaming, and the tantrums and the fact that mom and dad have absolutely no time for them because they're always busy with the little ones.
So today, we asked to have them moved, doesn't have to be today but sometime in the near future. I know where they'll be going, and it's not going to be better there. The couple already has quite a few children themselves and I don't think less attention is going to help the kids with any of their issues. That said, I just can't do it anymore myself.
My husband has reminded me several times that these aren't our kids and we didn't make them this way but I still feel responsible for them. I feel like a failure for giving up on them but I also feel like I've done everything I know how to do. It depresses me to think I didn't even make a dent in all of our efforts.
Please tell me I'm not alone, that others here have blamed themselves for not being able to do more too
I have no clue how to move past those feelings, they're eating me up inside.