[sblk]

Hi,
I'm brand new to this board and was searching for a post just like this one. I'm glad you posted this question because I've been laboring over this very thing for years but, especially the last couple of days.
I've adopted 5 children. The oldest is 9 and the youngest is 6.
My sister adopted 2 children. The oldest is 10 and the youngest is 8. She just told her children thier story on Thanksgiving. I haven't admitted to my children being adopted yet.
Don't flame me. I'm being honest.
I have to tell them because they aren't all the same race. Lot's of kids have asked them were they adopted and I told them to tell the kids to mind thier own buisness.
I've made some comments about what if I weren't thier real mother and some say they don't care, some say they'd cry. Then somehow they go right on talking about something else.
I've read the books that earlier is better but me or my husband never wanted to address it. In fact, he never wanted to tell some of them.
Now I'm stressing that I need to tell them. But how? I love them so much I don't want to devastate them. I don't want to be seen as not thier real mom. I just love them so much.
Each of my children were born with drugs in thier system. All of them came as little babies (taken as babies immediately from thier mother- all on drugs) but 1, he came when he was almost 3 and in the beginning he use to talk about his other foster mom. When he saw her a week after being placed with me he acted like he was terrified of her. He hasn't said that in years. Here, I'll mention that the one's that were placed in foster care for a while were abused. They were placed with me through emergency services.
I just need some advice and encouraging words. I will be telling them because I know it's the right thing to do.
Don't blast me. I know these kids have had a better life. We've given them more love and attention and just things than either my or my husbands bio kids (now grown) ever had. We're in position to do so much for them.
My heart breaks when I look into thier face and know I have to reveal that I didn't have them from my tummy.
Or, they may know more than I give them credit for.
Thanks for listening.