To the OP, I am sorry you are dealing with such a shock, that you feel so totally upended. I cannot imagine what that feels like. I can however relate to the sick painful tight feelings you have in your gut. I call them my deep gutteral ache. As a firstmom, I wish fro nothing more than to find my twin sons...just to know they are alive safe and healthy. I relinquished my twins 22 yrs ago, and my life has NEVER been complete since. I have a STRONG belief, that as parents " WE" have a responsibilty to our children, to always be open and hones...ESPECIALLY when specifically asked to do so....I of course do not know the WHYS of your parents, for each of us have our reasons, there are just NO good reasons to lie to your child...even if WE are told to do so! As adults our instincts and values TELL us differently. You have done the right thing by being HONEST to your husband...lies BREED mor lies. I feel you MUST approach your Dad, (of course lovingly) and have a heart to heart. Tell him how much you love him and how he and your mom were and are GREAT parents, but you must NOW know the truth, who knows since your mom passed on, he may feel now is a good time to tell you...he may have just GONE ALONG with her out of respect for her desire to be a mom! I pray my twins' parents have always abided by the honest and morral code of being truthful. I hope you get all you seek, for no matter the outcome, we ALL have a RIGHT to know WHO we are...GOOD or BAD...plain and simple. Please keep us posted, we are all in this triad world together, like it or not, we will listen!
