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Aclee ~~
I really think you got the wrong impression by my post. Let me clarify some things.
We never closed the adoption. It went from being open to semi-open (basically we went from e-mailing updates and pictures every month or so and visits to no visits and sending updates and pictures twice a year through the agency). We would never fully close the adoption.
I didn't really want to get into too much detail because this isn't what I wanted to concentrate on, but we stopped the communication after months of ongoing problems that escalated into untrue accusations, lies being told, name calling...and even going as far as us getting verbally attacked. So it most certainly wasn't us making a rash decision because things weren't going our way.
There are probably a lot of reasons that went into why we are trying to initiate contact again. I think the main reason is that time has passed and DH and I actually feel emotionally ready to try this again. It would be really nice to have a half-way decent relationship with BMom before DD is old enough to really understand what is going on. Plus BMom is older, has a son, and is no longer living with her parents, so we do have hopes that she has matured and grown (as have we) and that her mom won't be such a controlling factor from her end.
I just really think sending her another e-mail would come across as "pushy," but yet I'm not sure if that would be the right thing to do anyway. And, then to follow-up with that, not sure if or where to even send the package of updates and pictures if BMom doesn't reply back.
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