[AmahMama]

When I started fostering - I had no REAL idea how much time it took. I am amazed that working single people are able to fit it all in and work at the same time! Once I started fostering - I wondered how I raised my children and worked at the same time! LOL

Sometimes when an unwarrented request comes in the form of demands - it is very hard to wrap ourselves around them - and do it nicely.

I believe that bioP's requests should be made to the cw and it is the cw's job to arrange or deny the request. I am a foster parent - I am not the person that will give permission for the bioP to arrive at a photo studio, a MD appt, or a barber shop without the permission of the cw, and if the visits are to be supervised by the agency - the bioP's are in violation for showing up there. If the court ordered agency supervision - then the agency must be there to supervise. So, if they have to be there anyway - why not coordinate it as time management for all involved?

I was/am always annoyed by the visit no-shows and then expecting a "make-up" visit at a different time - AFTER the no-show. Not call ahead and reschedule - but expect the system to work around them without taking the rest of the blended family into consideration.

After having children from 3 different families, on 3 different schedules, with 3 different everythings - I opted to take only sibling groups.... at least then they were all at the same time. I transported when I could - which was most of the time - but this was my choice.

I must have a problem too - because after over 50 children - my back still goes up and I need to vent when I am ordered to take my and my families time to do something that I feel is unreasonable. Most times I am fine if asked - or I have some sort of input.

I have used this forum many, many times to vent... with confidentiality being what it is - this is one of the few places (and my dh gets tired of hearing it LOL) that I can vent and others actually understand what my issue is. I vent and then hopefully get over it. And yes, many of my vents are over bio's. I am not "bashing" as many would have it - it just seems to go with the territory - many of the things about the bio's are irksome at one time or another during placements.

I have had many, many children transition home, several on to adoption, and the rest went to relatives. I've been involved in many of the sicknesses of this particular system, and I also have been part of the successes and happiness. I still have contact with many of the children via parents (both bio and ad) and I love seeing how these little babies that I held and loved have grown into such breathtaking little people!!

So now I will get off of my soapbox - sorry it is so long!