Quote:
|
Originally Posted by thelowlanders
So alot of you know about my silly power struggle I took on with bio mom. The case worker and I came to a conclusion that all correspondence bmom wanted would go through her. Including the portrait shpeal. CW said she would arrange for a visit day, to transport them to Sears and have them done. But....
Today at CRB meeting, B Gma and B mom ask about the portraits. They beg it's his first year and it means alot. I recall that the CW had reassured me that she would set it up w/them. They proceeded to tell me that she said NO and also threatened them greatly to never, Ever call my home or do any more sneaky games. They were baffled and said they would never do that. Gma says she's an x-foster parent herself, etc.
So, I really feel like such a terd now. **ugh**
|
Let me see if I have this straight....
From my viewpoint, you now feel like your power-struggle was silly because of the prespective you got from this board, and realize in the big scheme of things these concerns were more minor than major, and since the scheduling thing has since been fixed your being so frustrated by it is silly.
So you and CW agreed to have everything go through her, which imo is perfectly reasonable.
You also felt that your safety was threatened by this birthfamily, so you called cops and told the CW about it.
After meeting the family you have doubts about whether your saftey was in fact threatened and feel bad that they may not get the pictures of the child they want so badly.
Again, this is my interpretation of what you have posted.
1. Things should go through the CW.
2. No matter how the birthfamily feels it is between them and the CW to make the picture thing work, it is not your responsibility and it should be done on the child's existing schedule if for no other reason that keeping a routine for him is important to development.
3. If you really felt that you safety was threatened it probably was, trust you instincts, and don't second guess it after someone "acts" surprised.
4. Just because the GMom is a former foster parent doesn't mean that your safety wasn't threatened or that things shouldn't go through the CW.
5. I think you are being too sensitive to the whole situation. I understand it, but you need to step away from the drama. Your responsibility is to take care of your family, bio and foster. Let the CW deal with the drama and demands of the birthfamily, don't get sucked into their feelings.... it is dangerous.
I suggest you take a step back and breathe. You did not cause this situation, focus on the children and the CW do the rest. Don't second guess you insticts to protect the safety of your family, I've been through that too, just focus on the children and let everything else go, you can't control it so don't waste your energy worrying about it.