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Considering that you have had some difficulties in reunion with your bmom, I think it is a very good sign that she is trying to help you. She knew you wanted to know about your bdad, so she is stepping up to the plate and trying to talk to him herself. I can understand why you feel awkward with all this going on behind you, but since she seems intent on contacting him and thinks he will come around, then I would just let her continue. Sit back and see what happens.
However, I do think it peculiar that he is "single" on myspace -- I wonder if he is living a double life. Has he been married very long? Or do you think he is getting divorced? I wouldn't contact his kids until you have exhausted all attempts to reach him.
By the way, for what it's worth, I found out some things last year about the health of both my parents (both did have health issues and died relatively young), but so far none of it has been relevant to me. I'm a healthy 55 year old with 3 healthy grown children. I was totally shocked to find out that my bparents had medical problems. In a way, I'm glad I knew none of that years ago. I would have been terrified of living and having children.
However, you have the right to your paternal medical history, and your bdad should provide it. Hopefully your bmom will be able to convince him.
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