[zxczxcasdasd]

Is it completely unheard of for a young man to be- dare I even use the word?- virtuous?

I am so steamed right now! J has been pledging a fraternity all semester (soph year, we asked him to take a year to make the decision) that is supposedly the "gentlemanly" fraternity. It's been fairly lame, but mostly okay. But the past 48 hours have been total crap.

The day before yesterday, it got around to the pledgemaster that J is a virgin. He immediately told J that as part of the pledge process they would be taking him to the Bunny Ranch in Nevada. J flat out refused and said he had a girlfriend of 2 yrs and if he was going to have sex for the first time it certainly wouldn't be with a prostitute. In reaction, while J was sleeping they posted on his facebook wall that his girlfriend was lame for not "letting" him go. J was woken up to a furious gf and her furious mother who thought J had said exactly what they posted- that she wouldn't "let" him go and was complaining she wouldn't have sex with him- when all he was doing was respecting her and their joint decision.

So it took a day to get that straightened out.

Topic came up with the guys again today at lunch. J expressed his opinion that strip clubs and such places exploit women and he would never participate in it by going to one. One frat "brother" immediately took this as J saying he was better than everyone else and was insulting him (who obviously does go to those places). He blew his top, grabbed J by the arms, threatened to beat him up, posted a nasty status on his facebook where all the rest of the so-called "brothers" filled the guy's facebook wall with horribly nasty insults directed at J. (which I saw and made me sick to my stomach)

I mean really? It's THAT scandalous to actually be abstinent and think that strip clubs are exploitative? Really? That's "gentlemanly" behavior?

The guy called in the evening to apologize for losing his temper and said he'd removed all the insults and called everyone who's posted them and told them he was wrong and J had never said the things they were attributing to him and he was a good guy.

But really, this is not the first time. Over the past 3 semesters of college, J has been punched, threatened, attacked, insulted and ganged up on because he's not sexually active yet by his own choice, doesn't use drugs, and is a Christian. (pick one as the reason du jour)

J has NEVER said that everyone else needs to make the same choices or that anyone else is bad for choosing differently. He's merely said what his choices are and what he believes...and it makes people that angry.

I want to throw up on the whole world out of disgust.