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Originally Posted by drjeanne
We're in contact with our foster family and luckily, they've never asked for anything other than photos and updates on our DD. I say luckily because I know I would have to say "no" to requests for money. We have given them money in the past and do send a generous amount each Christmas to them as our Christmas gift because we know it helps them buy gifts and food and celebrate the holiday but, I would be wary if they asked for the money. I agree with what others have stated that I am grateful for what our foster family did for our daughter...they created a loving, family environment for her during the 14 months of our adoption process but, it was a job for them that they were paid for and I don't feel I should be obligated to them the rest of our lives for doing it. I draw the line at feeling obligated and them asking me for money. Me giving them a gift is something totally different.
Go with your heart! You have to do whatever makes you feel good on the inside!
Jeanne
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I couldn't have said it better than this. I'm so sorry that you have to be put in this situation, Piper. I'm sure that part of you wants to give her the money, and it's probably not so much giving her the money this time as it is that it could be opening a can of worms for her to ask for more. At least that's how I would feel.
I think it's a little fishy that she is asking around the holidays. Maybe she wants to buy presents?