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You aren't alone!!! My parents are ok w/ using first names for my sons birthparents (although we don't talk about them or have a need to-my son is my son & they are his grandparents-not to disrespect his birth family but he is as much in our family as anybody else-there is never really a reason to talk about them)
My grandmother, on the other hand is just too old or ignorant about adoption-she continues to warn me about the chance that he could be kidnapped by "his mom" if she knew how smart & handsome he is (he adopted thru foster care & she has no interest in keeping in contact - I offered letters & pictures- I can imagine it is just too painful for her)
I would lay down the law w/ your parents - your child needs to only know that YOU ARE his/her mom & he/she has a birthmom. I would keep talking about them to a minimum - what do they need to know or discuss about them? I get the strangers thing - in the grocery - I got a lot of questions when my son was a baby, but not so much now - we are just mom & son. good luck - you ARE your ONLY child's mom, caretaker, protector, ect. you can respect your childs beginings w/ out disrespecting yourself. It's disrespectful to continually say a child has another mom/dad. YOU ARE IT!
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