Thank you for all of your advice. It's been almost two weeks, and I still feel like I don't want to leave my room. And I rarely do. I've been taking it easy, I don't have to return to work yet. But I feel depressed and unmotivated. I think about him everyday. My boyfriend who is the father seems to be able to cope with this so much better than I can. And I don't know how he does it. He says he thinks about him sometimes, and feels sad. But he doesn't constantly think about him. Thats part of what I am afraid of. I want to be able to get to the point where I don't feel sad about it anymore, but I don't want to forget him. I think that's impossible but I am afraid that I could. I have a very bad memory. I can't remember a lot of things. I am afraid that somehow the parents who adopted him won't keep their word and let me see him often. I have bad anxiety, so usually this is all me thinking too much into it and panicking. But I am really afraid of losing him, and I am afraid of everyone not being sensitive about it. Anything having to do with pregnancy, having a baby, and babies upsets me. I can't see it on tv, I can't see it when I go out, I can't see it at work (I work where there are a lot of children). It all makes me very upset. I feel like I am going crazy.
