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Originally Posted By lisa

I gave up my beautiful little girl seventeen years ago on her birthday - March 2, it was something I have regretted doing since I signed my name on the dot.

I want so much to see her and see what her childhood was like. Although the pain has lessened in years, I still feel the same way. And I ask myself every holiday why - why did I sign my baby away.

Does it get any easier? Has anyone searched and found that their child is dead? Or hates them? How do you know when to search? How do you know if you are interfereing with their life or if they want to see you?

I have waited so many years for her to turn that magical number 18 so that I could find her - now with one more year left, I am confused.
If anyone feels the same way, or can answer my questions - please let me know.
Thanks - Lisa