[Sis84]

Hi! I'm glad I found this forum! I am in much stress right now in my life.
I'm sorry that I'm venting, but I feel like no one else understands. I am a 24 year old biracial female. I was adopted at 5 months old to an all white family. I was born 1 lbs and 11 oz. My childhood was rough and good at times. However, during my childhood I was diagnosed with many problems. Asthma, ADHD, Asperger's plus cormobid conditions. Growing up with these problems, made it very stressful on my family.
To make matters worse, my parents were having marriage problems even before I was adopted. I am told that they were only trying to help me by giving me a good home. I was also an extremely hyper child growing up. My parents hardly took me out into public due to it. In 1985, my younger sister was adopted from a foster home. Growing up with her was extremely hard, as she was a NPD sufferer. She and I are about a year apart from each other which was hard to comprehend. At the age of 7 I was physically abused by my younger sister. She was only 5 years old at the time. How my mother handled it was, she sent both of us to our rooms. My father on the other hand, was not mentally there in the family anymore. My mother and father had many disagreements with each other and they weren't in love anymore. As well as growing up with asthma and other problems, I was overweight as a kid due to taking steroids for asthma.
Fast forwarding to several years later, my parents divorced in 2003. I have lived with my adopted mother for 2 years, and my younger sister also resides with us. She and I do not get along about anything! My adopted mother complains about how ugly her kitchen is and how tired she is from her job. She also asks for my help many times when she is home and not working. However, my younger sister doesn't have to help around the house as much! I am also currently unemployed due to resigning from my previous job from verbal harrassment from the manager and other co-workers.
Right now, with my adopted mother, I feel as though I don't get enough respect from her, neither from my younger sister. I am yelled at most of the time for any of my Asperger's symptoms being disruptive in their lives. I also can't form a bond with my mother as well I could when I was younger. I feel very upset by that.
Whenever I cry about something that affects me, she leaves me be. There are times when I want a hug and she doesn't want to. However, she will hug her grandchildren like no tomorrow!! I also try to discuss adoptee issues with her or anything and she says "I don't know.." She also lives in constant clutter in her home! I do my best to clean things, but then after doing it for years, I have become tired of picking up after both my mother and younger sister! I am also a germaphobe as it drives my mother crazy!!
God Bless!