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I wish we had more time for a slower transition. The original plan had been to visit one day and bring her back to the hotel the next day, but we brought her back after the first day, which in hindsight I think was too sudden for her. Although the 2nd day would have been very sudden also. I wish we had a week for transitioning.
I would encourage you to remember that it may be terrifying for your child when they arrive home, and if they spit, hit, scream, and manage to keep their elbows out, it's because they are afraid and very, very young. Our daughter had the build-a-bear and a book with pictures of our family, and we speak Spanish, and I read all of the toddler adoption books, and it was still really hard.
Also remember that it takes time. Our daughter came home at 33 months and she has been home 19 months and she is finally starting to feel at home and safe with us and loved and it is really wonderful now and she is such a funny, intelligent, spunky little girl. I am so lucky to be her mommy.
And be flexible with plans. We planned to co-sleep, which didn't work out at first, but after trying many different sleeping strategies, we moved a twin bed next to ours and that works out really good most nights. She still has a night every now and again where she thrashes in her sleep a lot.
You sound very prepared, I am sure your family will thrive.
Blessings,
Sonja
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