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I'm with Lucyjoy on this.
If this little girl does not have a diagnosed eating disorder, I wouldn't be treating her like she did.
Lots of little kids go through a stage where they seemingly live on air. My approach has always been to include something I know they like at meals. Choices work wonders sometimes. I also let them help me make meals. Lots of mess, but sometimes pride takes over and they eat.
I'm a stubborn cuss, and when my mom tried making me sit until I ate, I just sat. I didn't come from a fc background where I had no control over anything, tons of confusion and anger over what had happened, and a new mom. I cannot imagine compounding my own bull headedness with that!
I'd be more concerned about my relationship at this point. If she doesn't eat, take it away and offer nothing else until the next scheduled meal. And do the dessert thing, too. She may be so controlled that you only think she doesn't care. I think what's important is that she learns that you will serve the next meal and you won't be manipulated by her behavior.
Only if she starts to have health or weight trouble would I worry. Visit with your doctor about it. Tell the cw. And then drop the drama. It only seems like you are in control here. She's manipulating your time.
I wouldn't punish not eating. I'd just let it go and offer appropriate meals and snacks. Unless she's got other underlying issues, she'll eat when she's ready.
And let her go to bed at her regular bedtime. You both need your sleep.
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