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I wish I knew....
when, but I don't. I do know you will get through it. You will be okay. I am a birth mom to an 18 year old. I still miss her, but I don't regret my choice. I still cry for her, but I wouldn't change things. I am thankful that you have an open adoption. For your sake, please keep it open. In the future you may decide to pull back, just don't close doors. There are many amazing women here who will support you.
I know just how you feel. Please find a local support group. Or at least someone you can talk to in person, too. That helped me. Keep coming here to. You can find many to help you.
Love and blessings...
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