[mrsred]

For 4, 5 and even 7 year old, a time out should not be very long. General rule of thumb is on eminute per year... but since most our kids are so emotionally delayed you need to adjust for that. For instance my nine year old is more like a 5 year old emotionally, so a five minute time out is about all he can handle.
I do time-outs right in the room with me, where I can see them. That means it is usually in the family room/kitchen area (rooms connected). I have the child sit on one of the barstools that I have pulled away from the counter so that they cannot touch anything, and they face the timer so they can see how much time. I set the timer, but if they continue to scream or bounce the stool around I will go stop the timer and tell them we will continue when they are calm again.
Time outs are always followed by hugs and loving.
I don't use time outs on my 12 year olds. Generally theri "crimes" are more thought out, so the punishment is too. Usually that is loss of privilege.

Bye the way, Happy you said "My bio daugther is just not a tantrummer so this all all so new to me" ~~ Just wait a couple years. Our bio son now does all sorts of things he didn't do four years ago. Is it because he is now a preteen, or is it because he is adapting his behaviors to be more like his adopted siblings?