These kids are driving me totally, 100% insane!!!!
Here's whats happening- kids were having weekly visits with B-mom. They were honestly kinda little terrors and we went through no less than 6 babysitters since May. It takes them a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time to warm up and accept athority, which I understand, given all the situations. Well, about a month and a half ago, B-mom went AWOL, and parental rights were finally terminated (without goning specifics of the situation)During this time the childrne where not having their visits and turned into little angels. Like a total turn-around. Like, everyone was commenting on it.
HOWEVER, its been decided that its in the best interest of the children to continue with weekly visits. Which resumed two weeks ago...and the kids are back to being monsters. Ill define monsters as violent, abusive to one another, the three year old has started dumping everything out of every container, breaking anything she can touch and using screeching to send her messages rather than her words. She has also reverted to soiling her pants one or two times a day (she was doing this before and then stopped when the visits stopped) The eight year old is throwing tantrums all the time, which is totally new. Last night she could not find her gear for practice so she hid under her bed and screamed and cried inconsolably for 15 minuets despite my best efforts to coax her out. She pretty much stayed in that attitude all night.
Its really getting exasperating, the three year old in particular....I've never wanted to hit a child in my life but sometimes I find myself fantasizing about it...okay, maybe fantasize is too strong a word...but sometimes...like the other day when she painted her sisters walls and carpet with fingernail polish---OMG.
Pleas remind me that this is all normal behavior, because i just feel like Im going to lose my mind! I know there are sweet loving children in there somewhere...Im being just as patient as I can. Hugging them when what I really want to do is scream, telling a silly joke when I actually want to say something mean. I really am bonded with these children, I'm sure it does not sound like it from this post- but I can't imagine life without them at this point.
I've reported all these things to their case worker, and so has the woman who supervises the visits. There is no abuse going on during the visit. They are not bad kids. I think the children are just confused an anxious. The powers that be say the visits are going to be dropped down to every two weeks soon, maybe after the holidays.
Sometimes I feel like I just need a break....but like I said, having a really hard time keeping a sitter.
So, words of encouragement? PLEASE!!!!
