Casandra, all I can really add to what I've already said is that you are not alone. I think a lot of us bmoms have gone thru similar situations. In a way, it's a good thing that you can feel the sadness now, acknowledge it, and then let it go.
There will be little things that will trigger memories for you in the future. I don't think that ever really ends for us. But now you have some tools to use when dealing with the emotions. I'm always surprised when I get triggered these days...it always seems like such a surprise when I realize that I still have some grief and sadness. I can be standing in a crowd watching a parade go by, and then suddenly I find myself feeling sad as I watch the small children playing and smiling. Then I realize that I'm stilling missing my son, even though we've been reunited for over 18 years now. But I still miss the baby, the child, if that makes any sense.
One of your latest blog entries really touched my heart. I am so proud of you for being there for Jenna when she reached out to you last week. You've come a long way, girl. It just takes time and patience...and a willingness to remain open to yourself and to reach out to others. You're on the right road, my friend.
