[kidscrzymom]

This is my first post, although I have read oodles of posts for the last year or longer! This site is great, and I need some help.

Dh and I are new fos-adopt parents. We recvd our little guy Screech this summer. He was "low risk". Mom was absent, and had her services terminated early. Our TPR hearing was set for 1/09, all *was* looking good!

In the past few weeks, we've now established paternity. Dad is a "non-offending" parent. He's stable, has family support. He has a clean background, so he likely wouldn't have a caseplan to work. Now, why he didn't come forward til now is something I don't have an answer for, and I'd imagine it may be a moot point.

But we are preparing ourselves for the very likely scenario that Screech is going to be united with his father. I get that that's a good thing, for him.

My question is this:
any suggestions on helping our biological children through this? My 8y old boy and Screech are very bonded, and he's the most I am concerned about.
We had told them in the beginning about what foster care is. But once things moved along so quickly, and the TPR was set, we ALL let our guards down.

When do we tell them? Dh and I are planning to tell them once we have a definitive order, and timeline.

I guess the other question is, am I wrong to be presumptive that he'll go home with Dad?

Thanks in advance for any support or advice!

Mom to:
T-Brain, 2/98
Scooby, 6/00
Stinkerbell, 1/03

was hoping to adopt Screech, placed 7/08