[Jenkay]

I have been doing better and reading your post has really made me feel so much better. You have described me to a tee!!! I'm always second guessing myself and I'm a pleaser and want to make sure everyone is happy and when my parents expressed concern it freaked me out. My support team wavered what do I do???...lol So in the end my mother said it was my family and my choice and I know she will support me no matter what she may have just not made the same decision. That's my big thing, when I make a choice no matter how big or small when someone I trust questions it I begin to question myself. So my change of attitude? I called to check on R (our soon to be AD) and her FM yells "R your mom is on the phone!! omg!! LOL But I didn't panic I found that I was smiling from ear to ear and that's when I knew in my heart she's already mine. We may not know each other that well and times may get tough before they get easier (and i bet i even have another "what have we done moment") but she is counting on me. Then on the way to work this morning they have this little kid on the radio, he's a foster kid and says we need people to take care of us and then he says it has only been 15 seconds and another child has been taken into state custody. Yep this is what drew me in the first place. These kids need parents and I'm a parent who can no longer have children. I'm good today and tomorrow I will go pick up my daughter and we will have the first day of the rest of our lives together. It wont be perfect but it will be real and it will be great. Thanks so much for your help and I'd love to return the favor one day. PM me if you ever need the sympathetic ear of a fellow panicer!!..LOL

If God brought you to it.
He will get you through it!!