[nikkianni]

DH and I have always had a total of five family Christmases each ear. Obviously it's a juggling act but it's one we've been OK with. One of the Christmases is always the weekend before the holiday so that's no big deal.
My parent's Christmas is on Christmas Eve, as is DH's mom's. Usually we split the day between the two. Well this year we both have to work, possibly until 5 p.m. Obviously that's a problem.
So I brought it up to my Mother two nights ago. I love my Mom but she's the queen of guilt and can be very selfish. She's been "sharing" me at holidays for about seven years now and still comes up with some drama every year about it.
Well, she went off. I was forcing her to change her traditions and she's compromised so much already and if I really wanted to be there I'd be there, yadda yadda yadda. And then of course she brought up the fact that DH has two separate families (divorce) while I have one and that's not fair.....you get the idea.
OK. Normally I just take it and then try to do everything everyone wants us to do. That means DH's mom's Christmas and my parents' Christmas on Christmas Eve, two hours tops on our own Christmas morning before we leave for Christmas with DH's dad and then off to my big family Christmas. (Aunts, uncles, etc.)
Please note the two whole hours I get every Christmas to have my Christmas. That used to be OK. Now that DD is in the picture, it's not. I want to start our own Christmas traditions of Santa Clause, milk and cookies, etc.
As it is, we're gone until late Christmas Eve and out the door by nine Christmas morning, not to return until late that night.
I tried to tell my Mom this but she just doesn't get it. I asked if maybe she'd consider moving the big family Christmas to another weekend to make it more convenient for everyone and she flipped all over again.
DH and I are actually considering not even spending Christmas Eve together so that we can cover both events. How sad is that? I used to love this holiday but every year it seems to get worse.
All of that (sorry) to say this: I can't be the only one who goes through this. What do you all do? How do you cope? I'd love some thoughts on this.