I have a teen who just turned 15. I have had a problem in the past with her lying and she still continues to lie sometime. She is diagnosed with ADHD, has a short attention span, and she has a learning disability. I adopted her when she was 11.
The most recent lie was when I smelled perfume and asked both my daughters did they have on perfume, they both said no. I said somebody has perfume on because I smell it. They didn't admit to it, so I told them that I was going to smell them & if one of them was telling me a lie they would be in trouble. A short while later, the 15 year old said that it was her. I said so you decided to tell the truth, I asked her why did she lie. She said because she forgot. She says her friend (in high school) was spraying perfume and she walked into it after she had sprayed it, but she didn't know that she had sprayed it until she walked into it. She said it got on her shirt.
Later on when she took off her shirt and put another on I still smelled it. So I said if the girl had sprayed perfume in the air and it got on your shirt I wouldn't still smell it on you after you have changed the shirt. She still didn't admit to any lying.
The next morning my younger daughter (9) told me that she saw the perfume in the 15 yr. old's bag and that the 15 year old told her that her friend let her borrow the perfume but she had to give it back to her the next day. I have not had a chance to talk with her about this yet, but will this evening. I have decided that since she is going to lie I will just check her book bag every evening when she comes home. She had previously came home with a cell phone, and made up a lie about that. At first she said it was a friend's and she let her keep it. Then she said she found it. Since she couldn't tell the truth I just kept the cell phone and never gave it back to her.
Could anyone give me advice on the proper punishment for a teen of her age that continues to lie? It seems that it is a habit and hard to break.
