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I knew that it was time for my foster daughter to go when she became violent with my bio daughter. My foster daughter was 12 and my bio daughter 9. We tried for months and months to get extra support to no avail. By the time we had an understanding SW, it was to late...the damage to the relationship was done. I knew that it was time because I knew that I had tried everything to get this child help. In the end, my children had to come first. I had to process giving up on relationship with a FC. Do I feel guilty..yes to this day. Do I feel bad..yes. But, the children in my home need to feel safe.
We tried to get help for almost a year before giving notice. Looking back, I wish I had not waited so long. I think that you need to give a child time to adjust in your home, but after that maybe it is just not a good fit. If you know that you did the best you could, then it is time to let go. I think that wanting to hold on is a natural reaction, but sometimes it is not in anyone's best interest.
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