[busterleroy]

Bless your sweet, exhausted, overwhelmed heart. I was in your shoes at this time last year. I remember one day where I didn't think I could make it until noon, let alone another week, or month. I also remember one Sunday at Mass, standing in back getting ready for communion and I thought “God, please take over. I can’t do this without you.” And I meant it because I knew that putting our family together was going to be the hardest thing I had ever done.
Katie was the same age at pickup as your daughter. Attachment was an issue. Joey acted out because he was jealous. I don’t remember much from that timeframe, but I do recall I practiced attachment parenting as best I could, but every now and then I left to get a pedicure. I would slump in the chair and just revel in the fact that no one was screaming at me or for me for 30 minutes. It was heaven. Then I would go back home and try to be the mommy she needed me to be. I didn’t always succeed but somehow we made it.

And today she is the happiest, funniest, most loving little girl – better than I could have ever dreamed. She loves her mommy but seems very securely attached and is okay if I leave. We picked up in July, and I think things got better in February, if that helps. I know all families are different, and all kids handle things differently but that was the timeframe for us.

I got lots of great advice on this forum. A 4everfamily.org too. Your kids are closer in age than mine so it is a huge challenge.Honestly, my advice: look for anything, anything that makes life easier for you for the next couple of months. Let friends cook meals if they offer. Hire a cleaning service or let a friend or relative clean for you. Even one hour away, maybe just grocery shopping, once a week will do wonders for your sanity. A lot of churches have women’s groups that support families in times of transition – if you belong to one you could call and explain that you have a new addition, are feeling stressed and any help they could offer would be appreciated.

The thing that helped me more than anything was praying. I talked to God from my heart often in those days and He always answered. He knows you better than you know yourself, ask Him to help you. I am going to say prayers for your family. You will get through this, even though it might not seem like it right now.

A year ago I hardly ever posted on this forum. I was too….sad. God Bless you for having the courage to share your feelings.