[kakuehl]

That does put you in a very difficult situation and I understand your unwillingness to bring up the subject. I know what I would do in the same situation, but my views are formed by my own experiences and beliefs. I would recommend you ask the doctors what the quality of life is likely to be if a resuscitation is attempted. I'm not sure living on a vent, being fed through a tube and unresponsive it really "living" but I've seen families insist on it because somehow they can't let the parent "go." And of course, my dad has made his wishes very plain. (You're right it does make it easier.)