[ocracoke]

Whether or not you go through the courts you should get everything down in a legal document. A court order is always more enforceable then a private contract but it is still important to have everything written out. I would suggest trying to get a consent order (this an agreement you both negotiate and sign but is entered into the court) that lays out all the custody and support arrangements. It should include vacations and holidays as well as family important days and summer vacations. It should include weekly (or biweekely or monthly) visitation schedule. It should include the current child support amount along with how future child support will be calculated (by the state guidelines usually). It should include provisions for modification of child support and the termination. It should include language that states what the legal and physical custody should be. A consent order or agreement can be written to say that "...support and custody will be at the mutual agreement of both parties but in the event they are unable to agree..." This allows for flexibility and also allows for answers to arguments that may come up. If you can do this on your own, fine. If not I would suggest consulting with an attorney.

Samantha