[my2guats]

Okay, I'm the original poster so I think I'll make some clarifications. We are a foster home but we are also a foster/adopt home. When we were given the opportunity to care for this child it was 99% he was returning to birth mom within 3 months.
Once birth mom didn't follow through with things she needed to do to regain custody they began talking about "if the judge TPR." At that point we asked where he would go and we were told up front that he would go to the family that he was orignally reffered to.

So... yes they were honest and we knew there was a slim chance we would get to keep him.

He started off in a well baby home. he was there from one week old to 10 weeks old. Once it looked like he wasn't going to be transitioned straight into an adoptive home that family said that he needed to be moved because they were not able to do long term care (the next 3 months) that's when we got him.

When we signed up for foster care we decided that we would foster to foster (when kids go back to bio family) and foster to adopt (when kids have PRT). We want to help children who need support and if those children are ever in need of a permenant family we want to be that too.

So i guess what I'm saying is because this was an unusal case we weren't as prepared to foster a baby that would then go into an adoptive home. For us the kids would either go home or be adopted by us. Does that make sense. So i don't think we changed our minds. We know we want to grow our family as the Lord has willed (not using foster care as an adoption agency) but maybe through foster care. There is such a need.

All that being said...... the baby is what matters most and we just want the best for him. This will be his 3rd placement, 4th if you count birth mom's tummy and he is only 4 months old.

At one point the case worker did say that if TPR really does happen she would talk to her supervisor about us adopting since we were willing and able. I guess the supervisor told her no that he is to go to a waiting family so that was what was hard to hear. Even if this original family says no the agency will go down the list of their waiting couples until they find a family that says yes. That's where i get upset. We have already said yes. In the end the Lord's will be done.