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I can't say it offends me per se, but if I saw the term "exmom" I would be confused because I wouldn't know what it was referring to, and I would assume it meant ex-mom, as in "no longer someone's mom." If it must be abbreviated, emom is so much easier and understood, or expmom might work, too.
"Our bmom" doesn't really offend me, either, quite honestly, especially if I understand the context in which it's used, and it is clearly understood that it is not used offensively or with bad intent.
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