[carolynpep73]

I would honestly have to say that before I became a parent of an adopted child I would have most likely been guilty of saying something "stupid" like this. It would have been done strickly out of not knowing the proper way to ask the question. I'm sure I would have appreciated someone kindly correcting me and educating me on the most non-offensive way to ask in the future.

People are naturally curious and I believe that 99% of these comments are done strickly out of ignorance.
If the person knew how offended you would become they would never ask. I try not to get hurt by this question because I know what they're trying to ask...they're just not asking it properly. I'll respond with "her birthmother is in guatemala and I do not know her, but of course you know that I am her mother" and leave it at that. Most people can take a hint. They usually fumble to make an apology and say, "yes, that's what I meant".