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SKL and others. I totally get what you are saying. I really do. I am extremely grateful for all the postitive things in my life and how my parents, family, and friends contributed to that. No doubt about it.
The problem is that when you create or encourage an aura of "gratefulness" in this way you are sending a message to your child that can be troublesome. A friend of mine discussed this and said it way better than me.
...telling an entire country on national TV that these children were rescued, saved, and are lucky is akin to putting those chidlren in an emotional straight-jacket, IMO. What happens if Nikki one day thinks, "Hey, yes I'm glad to be an American, but I'm also sad I lost my home country of Bangladesh?" It's going to be harder for her to face and address and express those feelings, because she'll come across as ungrateful and angry, now that her adoption has been set up as something she should feel grateful for.
Perhaps what is said to Nikki and Bridget in their own homes is better. Perhaps they ARE allowed to grieve their losses behind closed doors--I don't know. So I'm not trying to say these aparents are doing everything all wrong. It could be that the speech at the RNC is balanced, at home, with more empathy and freedom for the children. However, it's still a pretty large burden to bear to listen to your parents tell an entire country that you should be grateful and feel lucky you were rescued. It's also just icky to use kids for political gain, IMO. It's all very dehumanizing.... makes them into political pawns, rather than human beings.
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