[kakuehl]

Djvj,
I respect you intentions, mine are very similar. I would caution you to remember, however, that your daughter is an young adult. She may not appreciate what she may see as interference as she attempts to establish herself as a self-sufficient adult. I think you can encourage her to invite her amom to be part of the process, insisting on it is sort of a red flag for me personally. Tread carefully and listen a lot!

Whether we raise biological or adopted children, it is always a challenge to make the switch to having adult children. (My mother always said, when I'm ninety and you're 70, I'll still be your mother and I'll still tell you what do do... As a result, I try to offer advice ONLY when my children ask.)

You have an exciting opportunity to get to know your bdaughter. If you have a relationship with amom, you can keep in touch and see how she's doing. You can ask your daughter what she hears from her parents.

For me, one of the most positive aspects of my relationship with D is that both of us have made it clear that my presence in his life does not replace her. She is and remains his mother.

Good luck!