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I can't tell you what to do but I would be seriously concerned about their closeness in age. You need to look at his past behavior, as well. I read he was mean to his brother to the point he needs to be separated. It could be due to his brother's issues or it could be as you said, his brother is more laid back and gets along with adults better. He is jealous of his brother's relationships with their caretakers. The second part would be a concern. It is almost guaranteed that any child will have some resentment about your relationship with your dd. The question is, will he treat her as he treated his brother and do you want to take that chance?
I would use alarms on their doors to be able to tell when they are up and down at night.
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