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I think I am veering a bit too but I find this interesting. First let me say I have 3 bio kids and then adopted 2 from the foster care system. We have people(who are looking to adopt )approach us that are aware of our adoptions to ask questions. When they find out our son was born drug exposed and our daughter is considered special needs too, ( I can barely bring myself to admit that her special need is that she is biracial- my state sees it that way NOT me) they kind of politely say that since they cannot have children and this may be the only one they get they really want the "perfect" child. I have been appalled by this. I certainly know that this is not the way all adoptive parents feel but we have recieveed this more than once. It is almost as if to say that if they are going to pay that much money they better get what they want. I have always been so shocked I never really say what I want but don't they see that if they did have a bio child there could be any number of problems? Our son is doing beautifully and he was exposed to a lot prenatally. He is 2 1/2 and hitting every milestone. I did not even take Tylenol when I was pregnant and I had a child born premature and die a day after his birth.
Anyway, that has just been our experience. It is certainly not always the case. I think in some ways having bio kids too has really helped us to be better parents to our adopted kids. We will not constantly be questioning behaviors as if they are due to being adopted. We have seen our bio kids do pretty crazy stuff (nothing serious-just funny) and as a parent nothing surprises me anymore!
I think I'll get down off my soap box for awhile. I'm getting dizzy up here.
Sorry to stray,
Mom to 5
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