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Been There
My feelings about losing my son to adoption were much like yours. I felt deep shame and judged myself harshly, so I expected others to do so as well. Forgiving myself was my toughest challenges. It helps to understand what powerful forces women considering adoption are up against.
Since my reunion I have generally been treated with compassion and understanding when I tell people about my son. However, there are many stereotypes about mothers who relinquish, and some people believe that we are uncaring and heartless. The challenge for us is to educate people who judge us harshly. In addition, until we forgive ourselves, it may be difficult to expect others to do so.
I feel much like you do, and many other moms do as well.
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