We all bring our own experiences and circumstances into adoption. Each experience, each circumstance, will affect our adoption profoundly. And so, each adoption will be different and, ultimately, it's up to only the people involved to decide what is "best" for that time and place.
If I have an opinion, I hope I'm safe to express it. If I'm challenged, I hope I'm open enough to consider it (although this hasn't always been the case, I'm afraid
).
Where it becomes a problem (and this is just my opnion, nobody is obliged to agree of course
) is when someone says they're "challenging" an opinion when, in fact, what's happening is they are trying to CHANGE an opinion. They are two different things. When we challenge someone's thinking, we throw out a new idea, then step back and let the other person work it out....or not. When we try to change someone else's opinion, we point out all the reasons why we're right adn they're wrong, we aren't satisfied until the person says "okay, you're right, I'm wrong and I'll change what I'm doing". ONe enhances dialogue and one stops it.
(BTW, this is so not a finger point, just a reflection based on some unfortunate experiences I've had out there.
)
'kay, just my .02.
thanks for reading it
ETA: I totally agree that this post isn't particularly harsh. I think it's actually been a good job at keeping respectful what's a hot button for a lot of people.....