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I also didnt adopt transracially to save the world -- I adopted transracially because I wanted to be a mom, and I figured that I could do the work it took to be a good transracial adoptive mom happily.
BUT at the same time, I also chose not to adopt children with diagnosed FAS or who acted out sexually. It was a conscious decision - I knew I didnt have the skills, and was unable/unwilling to make the life adjustments necessary to be a GOOD parent to a child with either FAS or who acted out sexually (plus I had another child in the home I had to take into account).
It wasn't based on the fact that I felt a FAS child or a previously sexually abused child was less deserving of a home, it was simply the fact that I KNEW I would NOT be the BEST mom for a child with that particular set of needs. I realize that it was about my OWN choices, my own short comings - my own lacks as a person & mother.
Does that mean I am prejudiced against children with special needs? No. It means I realize my own laziness/lacks in being able to parent a child with FAS. I look at moms with kids who sexually act out or parents of kids with FAS and am in AWE. Their job is TOUGH and I know it would wear me out completely and I would be a crappy mom.
In this case, this white mom made the "easier" decision to adopt a white baby rather than a black baby. LOTS of people do that. I think they are missing out of an amazing life, an amazing journey and I think its sad because my life and my choices have made me so happy.
BUT I fully realize I may argue that her life would be enriched beyond belief if she had made a different choice, in the same way that a mom of a child with FAS could look me in the eyes and honestly and with full sincerity, tell me I dont have a clue what joys I am missing out on and the costs are completely worth it. And she might think I am nuts in the same way that I might think a mom of a child with FAS who loves her parenting life is nuts (or at least a lot stronger than me).
This mom made her choice, as I made mine and everyone here made theirs, and we live with them. And the consequences of them.
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Jensboys - Mom of 4 Boys (2 adopted, 2 biological)  Reunited Sister
Fostering Miss Tiny and Miss Curious - Two Months and 13 months when placed May, 2009
Blogging about reunion with our 14 year old, Not reuniting with our 13 year old, transracial parenting, adoption and life as a minority family in a rural community. And oh yeah, now I have cancer.
'Oh, the audacity of authenticity. You’re going to confuse, piss-off and terrify lots of people – including yourself. You're going to pray it ends, then pray it never ends.' -- Brené Brown |