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i am a birthmother who had what i thought was an "open adoption" 23 years ago, but it actually was a "semi-open" adoption. we had biyearly letters and photos for first 9 years, then no contact for 4 as i pulled back, then no contact for 10 as agency did not forward our letters to each other. both sides thought other wanted privacy, so it took longer to reunite than i had hoped. we found each other through other means, and are now in first reunion (2 weeks ago).
i have to say i just learned two weeks ago on this site that adoptions exist where you can communicate and see the bchild. this was a hard moment for me, as i felt duped by the agency i had gone through. but i am grateful that i am in reunion anyway. if i was a pbp today, i would have chosen only a fully open adoption, and i enjoy hearing stories of what it is like on this site.
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