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I would not be offended as long as the question was phrased right. Perhaps something like, "I know lots of families strictly foster and others choose to adopt if the child is a good fit with their family. May I ask why you've chosen not to adopt Billy?"
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 Adoptive mom to my former foster son, age 4
 Former foster mom to his sister, 3, who we miss terribly
 Adoptive mom to my Guatemalan son, age 2
 Adoptive mom to my Guatemalan daughter, 1
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