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Old 08-05-2008, 03:15 PM
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RobinKay RobinKay is offline
3sonsmom
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stevenstwin
Love the ideas you have already, but also wanted to chime in to say ...don't plan a lot of "fun" activities, as in don't make it like a weekend visit or vacation. That might be overwhelming to her, and also sets up some expectations that might lead to disappointment. I can tell you everything I did WRONG, if that would help
1. Start off like life is going to be FUN every single day! Pack the weekend with excitement! Tell the kid about Disney World in three months right off the hop!
2. Don't have any rules - or at least be really, really lenient and bend your rules a lot, on the theory that you don't want the poor child to have a big shock and feel like your place is a downer. Especially make sure you let them think your home is a chore free zone, and they don't need to do anything to contribute.
3. Buy them stuff. LOTS of stuff, because every day should feel like Christmas!!!!

Okay, so there's my very best advice on exactly wht NOT to do ;-) I was so darn excited about bringing my son home after waiting for six months, that I lost all sense..I'm assuming I wouldn't do that with a placement I didn't know in advance. But it sure took us a few months to undo that damage and get things on an even keel I could live with long term!

Your honesty is amazing! I agree with everything you said. I felt bad we didn't replace ds's lost Gameboy as soon as he got here--he had to "borrow" his brother's. But it made Christmas special when he got one of his own. And lil guy actually likes to do chores--he gets to be with us, and he likes the sense of accomplishment. He loves to mow the lawn! (it's an electric mower and someone walks right beside him).
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