View Single Post
  #7  
Old 07-28-2008, 10:59 PM
brink brink is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,524
Total Points: 13,870.63
Donate
We brought home two four year old sons, two years apart. They came from the same small orphanage, an amazing place. They are now 14 and 12. I have to be honest and say I knew little about some of the issues, but also knew many kids home from this place who were doing very well. I didn't know a lot about attachment, except what I knew from being a mom to three bios and one domestic new born, then 7yrs. Both boys did amazing. We were blessed. Looking back, I can't remember anything that even resembled attachment issues. They both settled in quite quickly, though it took us all a bit of time to learn about each other. One son was speaking only English after two months. It took the second son six months, and then he suddenly took off with full sentences. They are doing fine in school, mostly just boy issues of school not being their first choice of where to spend their day! We have since adopted two daughters from the same home, ages 10 1/2 and 11 yrs at homecoming. Now that is a challenging age for all the changes. They had to jump into academics, which is another story all together. Our older daughter has done an amazing job of catching up, though still not quite at grade level. She worked very hard to learn the language and not be "different". It's more of a challenge for our second daughter, though I 'm hoping things will kick in this fall and she will be more motivated to work to catch up. I love hearing of older kids being adopted. I think it depends a great deal on where they've lived and the experiences. All four of ours were at the orphanage from either a few months old to 18mo old. It's very true that they have to learn the ins and outs of family life, and also who is in charge. Our older girls were so happy to have a family, but truly didn't understand what having a "vigilant" mom would mean to their lives. Sorry, girls! We've still had few issues, and since we've "been there done that" with our older kids, we recognize some behaviors as just typical preteen. Best wishes. Older kids are the ones truly needing someone to speak for them!

Last edited by brink : 07-28-2008 at 11:03 PM.
Reply With Quote